I still put on lip gloss to go to the market

Let me tell you about yesterday's trip to the market.

It started off normal, a little more crowded than usual, judging from the parking lot at least, but then I went inside... every old person in Denver was in there, and every new mom, and about 500 extra people that aren't usually there. There were no carts, they were mopping the floors, restocking everything, it was like it was the middle of the night, but it was 4:30 in the afternoon.

There was a lady in the seafood department just screaming...I don't know why.

They were completely sold out of broccoli?

There was puke next to the chicken.

The checker wouldn't talk to me, I think he was upset about some blueberries on the floor. He gave me my $3 item for $1 because he couldn't get it to scan....I tried to tell him, but he wasn't talking to me, there were blueberries on the floor.

I tried to help bag up my groceries to escape the madness faster, but I guess I'm not allowed.
Apparently a fun pack of tapioca pudding needed to escape too, it ended up in one of my bags, who buys tapioca? yuck.

tastes like horror

So my job is pretty boring, I have to sit at a desk all day, in a VERY quiet room, if you walked in here you would probably be totally creeped out by it, especially if the hummer was humming her usual ear piercing horrible hum, which is the only noise besides the occasional terrifying mumblings of the smelly bleeder...

Luckily I can listen to music, or books on tape, and thus the silence (and the terror) is blocked out a little. The music gets me through the day, so do my desk snacks. In particular my stash of pumpkin seeds, I buy them when I go marketing on Thursdays and then I carefully ration them so they'll last till I market again. I know it's silly, but the saltiness brings me joy,

Let me quote from scripture (or shcripshure if you're Ethan):

"Salt is good" - Mark 9:50

Yes salt is good, especially at my desk, my desk in the horrible silent room.

So imagine my dismay when I came in Monday morning and over the weekend someone had eaten the whole bag. I don't know why you would sit at someone else's desk, go through their drawers and eat their food. It has to be the same person who used to readjust my chair every night, so thank you Mr. Useless Security Guard who uses my desk and eats my salt.

So tonight I will leave the 8 month old bag of generic brand pumpkin seeds that taste like evil, in place of where my other ones were. Help yourself salt thief.